


Louis Vuitton Shades

by creepbythepool



Category: Rihanna (Musician), dane dehaan - Fandom
Genre: Other, dane and rih also have special diva magic, i may have exaggerated their lifestyles lmao, this could be a crack fic, this is just a friendship fic, this is sooooooo ooc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 09:43:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12010110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creepbythepool/pseuds/creepbythepool
Summary: dane shares some diva antics with rihanna and have some buddy bonding time on the beach





	Louis Vuitton Shades

Dane had been on the beach for two minutes and already he was annoyed by the wind blowing a little sand in his face. He contemplated just simply firing the gentle caressing wind he hired from the heavens since it also blew a small dirt particle in Bowie’s face the other day. He then looked over at his wife and daughter near the waves. Anna was showing Bowie seashells and other things. Dane smiled at his family and leaned back. Bowie was already showing signs she was becoming like her father after Dane found a little sapphire stone in her mouth and he was so proud.

He was happy until he realized he left his favorite Prada shades at the hotel room. Annoyed, he pulled out his spare Louis Vuitton shades from his pocket instead and put them on.

“Dane where’s your Prada shades?” Rih asked him, trying to set up a chair but failing, having her bodyguard do it instead.

“I forgot them.” Dane said sadly.

“Oh well, you’ll be fine. What you’re wearing now is ok.” She chuckled, stretching herself out on the chair and dismissing her bodyguard.

“Where’s Cara?” Dane asked, scratching his head. She was supposed to be coming to this little beach thing Rih put together today.

“She says she’s running late.” Rih said, handing Dane a bottle of Sprite from her cooler and taking one herself.

Dane looked at his hand and found gold nuggets that fell out from his hair. He rolled his eyes and shook them onto the sand below him. The Sprite turned into champagne when he uncapped the bottle.

“Now didn’t you have two other pairs of shades?” Rih asked, pulling out her phone and leaning back.

Dane sighed in distress. He did actually. He lost a pair yesterday trying to get his local Burger King to open early because he was really craving a bacon cheeseburger. (The manager happily took the shades and gave him one.) He lost another pair when his virgin blood shipment was delayed and he had to sacrifice that to the delivery company to speed it up. (He was slowly starting to look 31!)

And when he had met Kendall Jenner at that event and when Cara was about to introduce her to Dane, Kendall accidentally bumped into him, so naturally he had to burn that outfit in his fireplace, including the Prada shades in his pocket, his phone, his watch and any other accessories. (Anna managed to convince him to not replace his wedding ring.) It was his fault for coming in the first place, he told himself at that event, not even smiling at the cameras. He was really stressed out that night.

And this morning was also very stressful for him. When he got into the car with his family he had meant to dial Aubrey to congratulate her on her new movie (yes it was really late but the man was busy) but he had accidentally dialed one of his former “friends” from high school and the two got into a really awkward conversation. Finally he had signaled Anna and she saved him by calling his cell in the middle of the call and Dane had said “that’s my wife gotta go.” and hung up the phone.

 Rih roared with laughter at Dane’s troubles. “Ah Dane, it’s ok!” she giggled. “Just relax here and let your worries melt away."

“I’m trying,” he groaned, now scratching his leg. 

"I would do the same for Kendall. Thank god I wasn't there."

Dane grinned. He was glad that she understood him.

They both sipped their drinks in silence. The sun beat down on them. Rih glared back at the sun, and Dane suddenly felt cooler.

"By the way, why... are you wearing plaid?" She asked him, looking at his boxers.

"My fashion adviser had the day off." Dane lied. She nodded knowingly and took another sip. Dane actually just wanted to wear plaid today, and his stylist never had the day off, since Dane kept him in a cage located in his walk-in closet. Forcibly. But she didn't need to know that.

His phone buzzed and he saw that Luc had tweeted everyone about the Valerian premiere that night. Rih looked at her phone too. "Hah." she said.

Dane looked at the bottle, saw it was empty and got another one out of Rih's cooler.

"You still friends with that Lena girl?" Rih asked, grimacing, looking on twitter at who Dane followed.

Dane explained that his wife was friends with her. She had once sent him a nice wallet and upon seeing it was not Prada, Dane had promptly thrown it in the trash.

Rih raised her eyebrows. "Damn." she said.

Dane smiled and looked at his (new) watch. It was almost time for them to go and get ready.

He sighed and told Rih it was a lovely day. She agreed. 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> this was terrible i am so so sorry


End file.
